I love a good newspaper article that can spark a good blog post! In today’s NY Metro, there is a relationship article, Surprise! You’re Already In A Relationship, by Amber Madison that speaks words of wisdom to the dating world. Not that I am a part of that world – but that’s a whole other story! The article goes on to say that just because we don’t acknowledge a relationship on Facebook, doesn’t mean that we aren’t in one. Hmmm….sound familiar?
In the past, with whomever I’ve been involved with in some way, the guy never wanted to acknowledge what we were unless it could benefit himself. Imagine what that can do to a girl’s self-esteem. Once they found out I’m actually one of those girls with morals, it was “Oh, yeah umm..technically, we were never together. I never liked you.” Or if I liked someone, it would be “yeah, she really likes me. She’s fucking crazy, man!” Don’t get me wrong, women are guilty of this too. I blame “feminism.” Some women think just because a man is an asshole, they too can be assholes because “they can.” Newsflash: Just because you can doesn’t mean you should. Be the better person and cut them loose.
To quote the article: “Perhaps not defining our relationships is our way of dodging responsibility.” It’s become a game – one of the many reasons why I cut guys off the second they start playing. Two can play that game, but I am not one of them. At the end of the day, it all comes down to self-worth. If someone doesn’t have the balls to accept the relationship, then maybe it’s time to move on. I know they may be adorable and funny, but lots of good people have those traits as well. You can’t spend your life chasing someone who doesn’t want to be found.
My last boyfriend, though we kind of drifted apart for many reasons, knew right away that we should make it official. I was the one who hesitated, and while I may regret that in some strange way, I will always appreciate him for that. I’m still not sure if he was just desperate at the time (a question I still, to this day debate over) but when a man, or woman, knows that they want to be with you, stringing them along can cause major conflict and drama, which funny enough, people avoiding relationships think that they are avoiding but really aren’t! Yeah, you’re not fooling anyone.
“If you’re not ready to respect people’s feelings, don’t date and stop sleeping with people.” Grow up and take responsibility for your actions! Don’t say “well, everyone else is doing it this way” because guess what? Everyone else are inconsiderate assholes. Don’t add to the noise. It won’t kill you to be respectful.