Answers. The one thing that every single person on this planet is looking for. Some we find out easily, while others we may never figure out. Sometimes, the answer is so blatantly in front of us but we tend to soothe our mind with lies to make the pain less bearable. I guess for me, the truth is that I just can’t handle many things. My mind is constantly fighting negative thoughts at the speed of light and by the time I get a hold of them, I’m too far gone into my “OMG what ifs?” to come out alive.
I’m just now starting to see that I kind of suck at this whole living thing – or maybe that’s normal? Life would be so much easier if we had answers. Sometimes, I think God is showing me something, yet I get the feeling that I’m only imagining these things. Does that make me a bad person? Why do I feel like time is running out? If all of this makes me sound like an unstable basketcase, I apologize.
All I need is one chance. If things don’t work out, the truth will set me free and I won’t have to spend my life wondering “what if?”
All I need are those simple modern answers. I know I can wait for them. What scares me is what will happen during the waiting. I’m worried that everything mentioned in the song below will come true. I guess all I can do in times like these is to just trust in God. Trust that He will show me what He was working on while I was having panic attacks for the past 3 years. 😉