While organizing my writing portfolio, I came across an article I wrote last year on how to make the most out of being in your 20’s. I thought I’d share. 🙂
I recently came across this article on Thought Catalog titled Why Being In Your 20s Sucks. The first thing I thought of is my mom and my aunt saying “are they kidding me?” Whenever I used to complain about my life when I was a teenager, they always told me “just wait until you get older!” and that always scared the crap out of me. I always thought, “well, then what’s the point? Just shoot me now and get it over with!” Yeah, my teenage years are not my fondest memories but now when I think of those six words, “just wait until you get older” I see it in a whole new light. I knew what my family meant back then. It only gets harder. But now that I am older, and don’t get me wrong, life is not easy, I hear those words differently. Meaning, it gets easier. You must be saying “well, HOW?” Well, for me, it’s all about knowing who you are and starting from there.
When I was sixteen I worried about everything: Why doesn’t he like me? Why is so and so acting so weird? Why am I so hideous? You know, normal paranoid girly crap. I’d be lying if I told you that part of me doesn’t creep back once in a while, because it sure as hell does and its even more painful now than it was back then, but I get through it a lot easier now due to the experiences I’ve had since then, my morals and my faith. I never believed much in God back then, mainly because I felt like He hated me in some sick way. I know, ridiculous. But every day was a constant battle with myself and trying to figure out why nothing ever went my way, ever. But I won’t get into all of that; I like to keep that private. I’m more self-aware now than I was ten years ago. I may not know the answers to everything or what I want but I feel like a much better improvement of myself. Isn’t that what growing up is about? When I was younger, I never heard any positive aspects of getting older and I’m assuming nobody else has either because everyone’s trying to prevent the aging process. I want to be a better person with age, not miserable and tied down with stupid minor burdens. Allow me to run through the five points the writer, Kelsey Simpson, pointed out about why being in your 20s sucks and I’ll give you my view on each one. Before I begin though, I just want to point out that I am in NO way slamming her work whatsoever. These are just my opinions.
1. You have no idea where your life is heading.
– So accurate! A year ago I was completely lost to the point where I was really starting to scare myself. When you’re in that rut, it feels like everyone else has it all figured out but you and its like this one big race to see who can succeed the fastest! Rush rush rush! *coughEX-BOYFRIENDcough* Here’s the deal: (and trust me, I sleep a whole lot better when I remind myself this) your pace, your life. Take a deep breath and remind yourself that not everyone goes about their life the same way. That’s a wonderful thought when you think about it! You are exactly where you need to be. As long as you work toward what you want, you shall have it in due time. Oh, and that part about watching Netflix all day? Been there, done that and it made me feel like a bum. Get out there and take a walk! Sit outside and write. Do something. Just try to think positive. For me, it turns out that what I was searching for was with me all along: my passion for writing…hence why this is so long. 😉
2. Being in your twenties is like New Years Eve everyday — such a disappointment.
– Only if you let it. After being miserable for most of my life, I gave up on feeling doomed and searched for things I never imagined I’d find. Some even came to me without a warning. Like dreams…they can change your life in the blink of an eye. Most of us in our twenties are totally broke and that really stings, trust me, but the things that matter the most in life don’t cost a thing. Well….except music….but umm, we have our ways, right? 😀
3. You seem to have the “You are not a girl, not yet a woman” mentality.
– While we all love that Britney Spears song about growing up and feeling in between, all that matters is how you feel inside. Don’t rush anything. You might regret those times you wished your life away. Although, according to my grandmother, once you have your first menstrual period, BOOM! You’re a woman! Um, yeah.
4. You feel pressure from everyone and their mother, literally, to be in some sort of relationship.
– Thank God none of my family members do this to me. Eternally grateful for that. Although after my last relationship ended, everyone was like “aww but he was so sweet.” Ok, NO. You did NOT know him like I did and half of the shit he used to say to me, but ehh, such is life. I’m not one to be with someone just for the sake of being with someone. I’ve known people who dated everyone and their household appliances but for me, I tend to bask in my independence! Ignore everyone’s pressures. Only be with someone because you really want to. After all, it is your life.
5. You begin to finally learn the truth.
– “Maybe in your twenties you realize that the people who were assholes to you in high school are still assholes now. That’s just who they are, and it’s not the ‘phase’ your mom promised you it was as you cried yourself to sleep every night sophomore year.” So true! Somehow I always knew the truth. After learning the “truth” at a young age, I kind of always expect people to be nothing but shit yet I’m still surprised when they are. I guess a part of me wishes there are at least some kind people out there. I know there must be. I try to refrain from thinking like that a lot more now though. I’ve come to the point where if people want to be nasty assholes, then let them. They’re not me. Why should I care? Let them go on being assholes. I’m fortunate enough to recognize an asshole when I see one. If not, then I’d be in big trouble. I realize that sounded gross. Ok, moving on!
So as you see, being in your twenties isn’t so bad. Its all in how you perceive things. It could be worse. Think of all of the amazing things you always said you wanted to do in your life, even childhood pipe dreams, and start taking them seriously! Go. Do.
“When we were in our youth, we had dreams that we could fly
We had friends that weren’t visible, and love that never died
And as we grew old, I felt the pain that we always knew the truth
Love would heal, if we stayed true, to the dreams of our youth”