wait – verb
1. stay where one is or delay action until a particular time or until something else happens.
2. used to indicate that one is eagerly impatient to do something or for something to happen.
In a world of instant gratification due to technology, just mentioning the word, “wait,” feels like a death sentence. Yet we still wait for things – the bus, the subway, the street lights to turn green, an album or book release, our place in line at the grocery store, our food/coffee order to be made, and of course, new devices that keep us tethered to the idea of being in the loop. We seem to have mastered the art of waiting, yet there is one very important thing that seems to be out of question of waiting for nowadays: love.
Modern dating is something I will never feel connected to. Perhaps it’s not even “modern” to begin with, as I’ve witnessed generations before me getting blindsided by the wrong person, but as technology progresses and the thrill of instant gratification becomes more prevalent, it feels like we are losing our grip on how to form relationships and lasting connections with people. Dating apps make it easy to swipe away unwanted mates, but what are we really doing to ourselves? By looking for love through a screen and by looking for Mr. or Ms. Right Now, we are ignoring what we might want years down the road: true love that stands the test of time. Do you know anyone who actually met the love of their life through a dating app? Skip what you want right now and start thinking about what you really want for the future.
Waiting for anything substantial feels like too much work, so we settle. We eventually resent those whom we settle with and the sick cycle goes on and on through generations. Sometimes we don’t even know we are settling until we meet someone or we are shown something that opens our eyes to what we’ve been subconsciously hiding. When true romance often feels like a dying art, it’s hard not to become jaded. But we also need to remember that things are only the way they are because the wrong people started a trend somehow. I mean, look at the term “selfie.” Admit it. You feel like a total douchebag using that word in your vocabulary. Even the elderly are saying the S word! Imagine how we are going to sound when we are 70 and still using that word to define taking a picture of yourself. We are going to be known as the first generation who turned the English language dictionary into a book of ridiculous slang. Trends happen, but it only takes one person to stand up and fight for something different and worth chasing. You’re gonna have to put your pride aside and face vulnerability for once.
I know what you’re thinking. “But waiting is so hard! I have a life to live,” and trust me, I know how hard it is to wait for something you’re not entirely sure you’ll get, but once you’ve conquered all of those doubts, while ultimately living your life, the rewards are totally worth every minute spent waiting for the right person to come along. Maybe I really am a naive hopeless romantic who grew up on way too many Disney movies (and Serendipity), but if we don’t follow our gut instincts, despite what negative experiences we’ve had in the past, we are as good as dead.
Think of every happy couple you know. When you’re around them, do you feel their magic radiating off of them? If it’s palpable to you, imagine what they’re feeling! Believe that you can have that too. But you’re not going to get it if you’re looking for an instant connection in the wrong places for one night. Patience is not about how long one can wait, but how you behave while waiting. Those who are not willing to risk it all for love, should not be surprised when they get second best. Have faith – if you are willing to walk through fire for something, then you will find what you seek.
One of my favorite scenes from Serendipity was filmed right here. John Cusack’s character Jonathan tells Jeremy Piven’s character Dean to be jackass. In this modern society, anyone who shows any form of raw, true emotion is a jackass. Emotions are feared, hence why people can’t figure out how to form any lasting connections. Cusack’s character of Jonathan goes out on a limb to find Sara…and guess what? He does. Moral of the story: screw society and be a jackass. Love someone? Go get them. Tell them. Wait for them. Don’t let the so-called rules of modern love ruin your chances of happiness. Fairytale love does exist. Don’t listen to those fools who tell you otherwise.
Always remember that waiting is a sign of true love and patience. Anyone can say ‘I love you,’ but not everyone can wait and prove it’s true. Don’t let the moment pass. Chances are far and few.
“Wait, won’t you wait on it. All you’ve got will only carry on.”