I have no business being in this world.
I’m tired of waking up every morning only to wish I never existed.
I’m tired of seeing the disappointment on my mother’s face.
I’m tired of this overwhelming sadness and the numbness of my heart whenever I find out something painful.
I’m tired of being told I’m wonderful by people who don’t act on it.
I’m sick of this sickening, twisted feeling in my stomach.
I’m sick of the never ending push pull of my life as I watch others around me get by with such ease.
I’m sick of being told I’m wrong when my views differ from others.
I’m sick of being told I am not allowed to feel sad.
I’m sick of watching every fear I’ve ever had come true.
I am not a human being anymore.
I am subhuman – shoved into the confines of a world I can no longer serve.
*I wrote this a couple of years ago and just found it in an old journal. I know it’s pretty dark but it’s honest, raw and something we all feel from time to time.